Ancrispa: Diário de Bordo

Avatar do usuário Ancrispa 2555 8 57
Episódio de hoje “Dumb phones and smartphones”
Tricia wants a smartphone. So she started looking around at the shops to choose one. She decides to come back to one of the shops that she first saw because the price was very cheap. Here is the dialogue between Tricia and the shop assistant:
Shop assistant: Can I help you?
Tricia: Yes. I saw a mobile phone in the shop window. The black one with a plan that offers a 60 minute calling plan and internet.
Shop assistant: Wait a minute. I’ll get it for you.
After some minutes the shop assistant comes back.
Shop: This mobile phone is the cheapest with a plan of internet included.
Tricia: I like it. I’ll take it.
Shop: Thank you very much.
Tricia is over the moon. She comes back home and Bill is on the couch watching TV. She goes to him and tells the news:
Tricia: Bill! I’ve bought a smartphone with internet plan and 60 minute calling plan for just a hundred pounds a month a signature!
Bill: What? A smartphone for just a hundred pounds! No way! Let me see this smartphone !
Tricia: It’s here and it comes with a pen drive. Isn’t it, amazing?
Bill opens the box and starts laughing.
Tricia: What is so funny?
Bill: Oh, dear. It’s not a smartphone it is a dumb phone!
Tricia: It cannot be! I asked a mobile phone and Internet!
Bill: Oh, darling. This was your mistake. You should have asked a smartphone. Look this pen drive is for you to connect internet to a computer. And it is a slow speed internet connection. This mobile phone is only for callings. It’s useless and very poor in terms of technology.
Tricia: But the shop assistant told me that I would have internet!
Bill: Indeed. You do have internet service in this pen drive to connect to a computer.
Tricia feels sad and wants to cry.
Bill notices and says: You know dear, sometimes I feel you are so naïve that I have the impression you come from another planet. But you can bet that you are my favourite martian!
If one day I have the opportunity to travel to Mars I’ll be quite glad to meet your real parents…
Bill hugs Tricia and kisses her very gently. She feels better. She is indeed a happy martian.

Episódio de hoje: “at the vet’s”
Tricia is particularly worried about Fluffy. The cat has been doing nothing but sleeping. It’s a black male Persian cat. She decides to share her worries with her husband Bill.
Tricia: Bill
Bill: What?
Tricia: Have you noticed how Fluffy is pale?
Bill: Since when a cat begins to get pale?
Tricia: Fluffy does not do anything. I’m deeply worried about him.
Bill: That furball has been like that since we bought it. There is nothing wrong with him. On the other hand, the difference in his weight is amazing. The guy looks like a tiger in size not a pet.
Tricia: I think we should take him to the vet’s.
Bill: What an expensive cat! We have spent more money on this cat than a woman at a shoe store on a Black Friday Day!
Tricia: If this cat dies you will bear the blame for your whole life!
Bill: It won’t be a heavy burden.
Tricia: Let’s go Bill!
Bill: ok. Pick up that bloody cat.
At the vet’s:
The vet examines Fluffy very carefully on the x-ray and then she says:
Congratulations! Your female black Persian cat is pregnant! There are four beautiful kittens!
I could see on the X-ray!
Bill gets pale and speechless whilst Tricia is in seventh heaven.
Tricia says to Bill: It is a female cat! Lovely! Now our family is going to get bigger. I can’t wait to tell the children! They will get so glad!
Bill: I think I’ll do overwork to feed all these kittens. I never thought that one day I would have so many mouths to feed! Good heavens!
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Avatar do usuário PPAULO 42175 6 33 742
“The problem with a call center attendant”

Bill is sitting on his couch. When he tries to turn on the TV he cannot because the remote control supplied by the cable company isn’t working. Without the signal from the cable company, Bill cannot watch any channel.

There´s a glitch in the paragraph, or it´s me? If the remote is out of order, why we are told that the guy is without the signal from the cable company. Wouldn´t he simply turn the TV on manually? Then he would use the TV menu?
Anyway, because you are with a faulty remote doesn´t mean the signal isn´t coming...that the server/company is at fault.

Maybe it wasn´t the TV remote, but the remote of the satellite box receiver...then would be another can of worms altogether!
Avatar do usuário PPAULO 42175 6 33 742
Okay, would be more like the Sky provider (a DBS system if I am right).
DBS - direct broadcast system, generally provide a box and a remote to access their programme listings. Generally a high-powered mini-dish service.

If so, with the remote out of order, would be impossible to access their broadcasting, but not render the TV set impossible to turn on. I understood, what you meant, though.
Avatar do usuário Ancrispa 2555 8 57
Episódio de hoje: “The Italian boss”
Bill has just arrived home. He comes into the kitchen where Tricia is making dinner.
Here is the conversation between this lovely couple:
Bill: Good evening, darling.
Tricia: Good Evening. How was your day?
Bill: It was a very hard day but I have news for you.
Tricia: What sort of news? Good, I hope.
Bill: I invited my boss to dinner here with us tomorrow. And he’s going to bring along his wife.
Tricia: What? Have you lost your mind? You’ve been always telling me I’m a terrible cook and now you invite your boss and his wife to come over and have dinner? Do you want to lose your job? What am I going to prepare for them? I just cook the basics so that I can get by. Bill sometimes I really feel like punching you in the face.
Bill: Darling. Don’t worry about it. You are not going to cook anything. I’ll take away from a very good Italian restaurant.
Tricia: Why on earth Italian food? Is he Italian?
Bill: Yes, dear. And he doesn’t speak English.
Tricia: Terrific! Delightful! Your boss doesn’t speak a word of English. How will I be able to communicate with him? I don’t know Italian. Should I learn all the Italian drills till tomorrow? What do you suggest?
Bill: Well, you can talk with his wife. She’s Brazilian and speaks English.
Tricia: At least I can speak with the wife. But we must tell them the truth about my limited abilities in the culinary world. It’s not right to deceive them. Besides, let’s suppose one day they decide to eat out and go to the same restaurant and order the same dish?
Bill: Oh right, dear. We will tell them the truth. But let them first eat the food with great pleasure and make compliments about your wonderful abilities in the culinary world, and after that we tell them. I want to see Francesco’s face when he finds out the truth. It will be a very unique moment.
Avatar do usuário Ancrispa 2555 8 57
Episódio de hoje: “The awaited dinner” ;)

Tricia ordered the Italian food. The food has just arrived. Tricia will heat it up when the guests arrive.
She is very nervous because she feels that this is not the right thing to do. She certainly thinks that it doesn’t matter the situation you must be honest. But her couch potato husband Bill insisted on this stupid plan and she didn’t have choice.
Now the lovely couple is in the living room waiting for the Italian boss and his Brazilian wife. The bell is ringing. Bill goes towards the door to open it and welcome the couple:
Bill: Good Evening!
Franco: Buona nsera! Questa è la mia moglie Maria. Lei è brasiliana.
Good evening! This is my wife Maria. She is Brazilian.
Bill: Nice to meet you. Please, come in.
Tricia : Good evening. I’m Tricia, Bill’s wife.
Maria: Nice to meet you.
Franco: Piacere!
They sit down and the chat begins very lively.
After some time they decided to go to the table. Tricia runs to the kitchen to heat up the food.
Bill keeps entertaining the couple.
Tricia comes with a lot of Italian dishes and the smell is delicious. She lays the table with all the food and says:
You know I don’t cook very well. I bought all this food from a very traditional Italian restaurant. I hope you really enjoy your meal.
Maria: Oh dear! Don’t worry! I’m not a great cook either! The most important thing is our gathering here and we are having a wonderful time!
Franco and Bill start eating the food with verocious appetite ! And the two women burst out laughing on seeing this amusing scene.
Everything was going very well when suddenly the Fluffy (the Persian cat mother of four kittens) jumps onto the table attracted by the food smell. The kittens followed her mother and also jumped onto the table. They attacked the food on the trays .
Franco starts yelling: What the hell! Che diavolo! Where do these cats come from? Da dove vengono questi gatti?
Tricia and Bill got desperate trying to pick up all the cats from the table. But they are smarter and faster . They run, run and run on the table. They forgot the food and begin to play with one another.
Seeing no solution to the problem the guests start laughing at this unusual and unexpected scene. Franco even tries to calm down Bill and Maria does the same with Tricia. They went to the sofa and start drinking some wine and eating some appetizers that were on the coffee table.
The cats finally got tired and came down from the table with their mouths full of tomato sauce and grounded meat from the lasagna….
When the guests left the house, Bill talks to Tricia:
Dear! What a disaster! It couldn’t have been worse!
Tricia: Well! Look at the bright side your boss got amused by the situation.
Bill: Yes. I had never seen him laughing heartedly before.
Avatar do usuário Diego Pikulski 2100 2 5 42
Hello o/

I was reading your stories and I see you have a lot of imagination Ana :D
I want to say I liked all your stories and I can see you know italian too, I am impressed.
(I didn't forget about your knowledge in french too. How many languages are you learning? :lol: )
Keep doing these great stories you do and I wish good luck in your exams.

All the best my friend.
Avatar do usuário PPAULO 42175 6 33 742
Tricia ordered the Italian food and the food has just arrived. Tricia will heat it up when the guests arrive.

She is very nervous because she feels that this is not the right thing to do. She certainly thinks *that it doesn’t matter what people will think of you, you must be honest. But her couch potato husband Bill insisted on this stupid plan and she didn’t have a choice.

*that it doesn´t matter what situation you get into, you must be honest.
Avatar do usuário Ancrispa 2555 8 57
Hello Diego
Thank you very much for your words and consideration. I think one of the best ways to improve my English is through writing. It hasn’t been easy for me so far, but there is a slight chance that in a foreseeable future I’ll succeed on it.

Hello Paulo
Thank you very much for your corrections. You are always welcome to correct my mistakes. I have learnt a great deal since I started writing here.

I wish you alll the best, my friends ;)
Avatar do usuário PPAULO 42175 6 33 742
Hi there, Ana! You are improving by the day, as noticed by Diego. And I bet you will get there, you will ace that test.
I am glad that my poster have been of help for you, and I have to say that I, myself, have learned a great deal here.
I am proud of the site, and of the teamwork; and I would like to share the compliment with all those devoted members that
have been around, sharing knowledgeable information and English tips.
I am inspired by the natives, teachers, other advanced learners and all those that have shared their valuable insights here, all this time.
May our English keep improving and growing continuously like it has been, and that we pass on knowledge to others in need of it. God bless we all, and I wish you all have a great week!
MENSAGEM PATROCINADA Leia o e-book Aprendendo Idiomas por Conta Própria e conheça as técnicas utilizadas pelos Experts para aprender idiomas. Com ele você vai aprender a aprender inglês!

Baixar uma Amostra Grátis!
Avatar do usuário Ancrispa 2555 8 57
It’s been a while since the last time I posted here. It’s important to say that all these stories are from my imagination. I have made up them so far with a unique purpose: to improve my writing skills.

Bill is at the kitchen with Tricia and he’s down in the dumps. He must tell Tricia that he is going to lose his job due to the world economic crisis. The company where he works is in its last legs. And He has just found out an internal layoff list where his name is on it.
Tricia is making dinner. He starts the conversation:
Bill: Dear, we need to talk.
Tricia: Of course, my dear. What happened? You don’t look particularly radiant.
Bill: I’ve found out that my name is on an internal layoff list. I’m going to lose my job.
Tricia: Oh! This is terrible news! But dear, are you sure?
Bill: I’m as sure as I know that snows heavily in Siberia during the winter.
Tricia: Dear don’t panic! We need to be optimistic like Pollyana.
Bill: Who is this Pollyana? Is she English? Tricia: Pollyana is a classic of children’s literature. I can’t believe you’ve never heard about it before.
Bill: No. Besides in what possible way a novel could help me at this very moment?
Tricia: Well, to put it in a nutshell: It’s a story about a little girl a very poor one, first she lost her mother and then her father, so she went to live with her aunt, an austere and very rich woman.
But Pollyana overcame bravely all her difficulties with positive thought, gentleness and lots of love.

Bill: Do you want me to burst out crying? Seriously Tricia, sometimes I think you travel to another country while I’m talking to you.
Tricia: Don’t be rude! Have you tried to look at the bright sight?
Bill: What bright sight! For heaven’s sake!
Tricia: We can start a small business. I’ve always wanted to open a restaurant.
Bill: You are the worst cook of England and it’s not exactly a secret for our friends and acquaintances…
Tricia: I’ve always wanted to open a language school too.
Bill: We just speak English.
Tricia: Yes. But your boss is Italian and his wife is Brazilian. Now we have English, Italian and Portuguese.
Bill: Dear! You are a genius! I haven’t thought about that! This can be an excellent solution! Franco is also on the list and another day at the office he brought up this conversation about changing of careers. Tomorrow I’ll talk to him.
Tricia: You see! Now you are acting like Pollyana. Positive thought is always the best solution my dear. I’m sure this project will work.
Bill: You know dear I don’t know what I would have become if I hadn’t met you in my life.
Tricia: Probably you would still be living with your parents because you wouldn’t get married to another woman but me. Who else in this magnificent world would love you as I love?
Bill: It’s true my love. Shall we eat now? This entire philosophical subject has just increased my appetite.