Correção de "letra de música punk (Viking Dog)"

Gostaria que vcs revisassem a letra de uma música para verificar se contém erros, ou trechos que podem ser melhorados para soar com mais naturalidade.
Obrigado!
Segue a letra:

I was walking on the street with my viking dog
when I've found an odd girl passing by with her dog
I must say both look great by greeny trees and shiny cars
The miss shaking her little butt and the bitch her tail as well

And I've talked to the girl and the girl looked to me
and the bitch to my dog and the hound did the strike
And the bitch fell in love, the lady said goodbye
I got her phone, she loves my dog more than me than you and I

My viking dog is the best: All the bitches love him!
they don't dig me
That's it, lil' boy!

Many times when I walk I can chat with the girl
and the mongrel does easily hit on the bitch
The lady gives me a viking smile I say she's my viking girl
And she turns to my dog, the bitch truly loves the dog
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Sugestões de correção:

I was walking on the street with my viking dog
when I met an odd girl passing by with her dog
I must say both looked great by greeny trees and shiny cars
The miss shaking her little butt and the bitch her tail as well
Ótimas sugestões, valeu!!! :)