Correção de pontuação no texto "I live in a city called..."

Eu escrevi o seguinte texto: "I live in a city called Belo Horizonte, which is located in the southeastern Brazil. Belo Horizonte is a metropolis because of its importance to the Brazilian economy and the number of inhabitants, which is around 2.5 million people. I have moved downtown to make it easier to get to work and college. However, when it is necessary to go to another place I take the subway or the bus. The subway is very much important in a big city with a complicated transit, mainly in the "rush time"; although, is not as efficient, extensive or vast as it should be or as it is in other cities like London and New York."

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Sugestões de correção:

I live in a city called Belo Horizonte, which is located in the southeastern Brazil. Belo Horizonte is a metropolis because of its importance to the Brazilian economy and also because of the number of inhabitants, which is around 2.5 million people. I moved downtown to make it easier for me to get to work and college. However, when it is necessary to go somewhere else I take the subway or a bus. The subway is very important in a big city with a complicated traffic system, especially in the "rush hour", although it is not as efficient, extensive or vast as it should be or as it is in other cities like London and New York."
obrigado!