Correção de texto: Married couple in fashion
- Edilia Rodriguez
- Membro desde: 14 Abr 2015, 15:14
- Perfil · 13 Mensagens
Married couple in fashion
Today I’ve got some work out to do. As usually I woke up quite early. When I was turning around my house, I faced with a married couple and their big dog. Both were smoking a cigarette and they were argued with one another. Actually, I came across with that couple always that I went out. But today was different, so they stick out my attention. The man was using t-shirt and short pant, I might observe that his legs was full of scratch and was bleeding! They seemed junkie, as I could see mark of needles on their fingers and also on their vein of arms. The man’s face was swollen with very scars on it.
Despite this, that man had fantastic look! He was in fashion. He scraped the hair and just left a little bit on his meddle of his head! As if that were not enough, he painted the tip of that rest of hair with pink color like their dog’s collar. His hair looked rectangle shape, with pink color on the top! Very, very funny indeed! I like them!
I would like your corretion please
Thanks
Today I’ve got some work out to do. As usually I woke up quite early. When I was turning around my house, I faced with a married couple and their big dog. Both were smoking a cigarette and they were argued with one another. Actually, I came across with that couple always that I went out. But today was different, so they stick out my attention. The man was using t-shirt and short pant, I might observe that his legs was full of scratch and was bleeding! They seemed junkie, as I could see mark of needles on their fingers and also on their vein of arms. The man’s face was swollen with very scars on it.
Despite this, that man had fantastic look! He was in fashion. He scraped the hair and just left a little bit on his meddle of his head! As if that were not enough, he painted the tip of that rest of hair with pink color like their dog’s collar. His hair looked rectangle shape, with pink color on the top! Very, very funny indeed! I like them!
I would like your corretion please
Thanks
POWER QUESTIONS
1 resposta
- PPAULO
- Localização: Rio de Janeiro-Brazil
- Membro desde: 21 Fev 2013, 23:49
- Perfil · 76.1k Pontos · 15k Mensagens
Married couple in fashion.
Today I had some work out to do and, as usually, I woke up quite early. As I was turning around my house, I saw a married couple and their big dog. Both were smoking a cigarette and they were arguing with one another.
Actually, I came across with that couple every time that I went out. But today was different, so all of sudden they drew my attention/caught my eye, and I will explain why.
The man was using t-shirt and short pants, I noticed that his legs was full of scratches and were bleeding! They seemed junkie, as I could see mark of needles on their fingers and also on the veins of their arms. The man’s face was swollen with very scars on it.
Despite this, that man had fantastic a look! He was in fashion. He scraped (?) the hair and just left a little bit on the middle of his head! As if that were not enough, he painted the tip of hair left in pink like matching their dog’s collar. His hair was shaped like a rectangle, [1] dyed/bleached pink on the top! Very, very funny indeed! I like them!
[1]or...with a section on the top (of his head) dyed pink.
I would like your corretion please
Thanks
=====================
Today I’ve got some work out to do. As usually I woke up quite early.
Normally, the narrative (as in the case of this sentence) would stick to one verb tense. Here (to my thinking) "today I´ve got some work to do" seems like present, the second part is in past "I woke up..."
and they were argued with one another...
My suggestion: and they were arguing with one another OR they argued with each other
full of [things...] - the things are in plural, there´s no "full of one scratch/two scratches", isn´t it?
If one leg was bleeding then the verb "was"; if both legs then "were". To avoid confusion to the reader as if one or both legs were bleeding, you could also say ''and there was blood/I could see blood !"
At first I thought of changing "junkie" to "fakes" (that is, it was all make-believe bleeding and wounds), but then I realized that you might want to state that they (the couple were "junkies" drug addicts/users). Up to you, then.
Be careful with consistence in your texts in the future, since your chosen title was "a couple in fashion" but you were talking about his "fashionable" looks all the way. If it was a couple it had to be described the looks of both people, for example.
Today I had some work out to do and, as usually, I woke up quite early. As I was turning around my house, I saw a married couple and their big dog. Both were smoking a cigarette and they were arguing with one another.
Actually, I came across with that couple every time that I went out. But today was different, so all of sudden they drew my attention/caught my eye, and I will explain why.
The man was using t-shirt and short pants, I noticed that his legs was full of scratches and were bleeding! They seemed junkie, as I could see mark of needles on their fingers and also on the veins of their arms. The man’s face was swollen with very scars on it.
Despite this, that man had fantastic a look! He was in fashion. He scraped (?) the hair and just left a little bit on the middle of his head! As if that were not enough, he painted the tip of hair left in pink like matching their dog’s collar. His hair was shaped like a rectangle, [1] dyed/bleached pink on the top! Very, very funny indeed! I like them!
[1]or...with a section on the top (of his head) dyed pink.
I would like your corretion please
Thanks
=====================
Today I’ve got some work out to do. As usually I woke up quite early.
Normally, the narrative (as in the case of this sentence) would stick to one verb tense. Here (to my thinking) "today I´ve got some work to do" seems like present, the second part is in past "I woke up..."
and they were argued with one another...
My suggestion: and they were arguing with one another OR they argued with each other
full of [things...] - the things are in plural, there´s no "full of one scratch/two scratches", isn´t it?
If one leg was bleeding then the verb "was"; if both legs then "were". To avoid confusion to the reader as if one or both legs were bleeding, you could also say ''and there was blood/I could see blood !"
At first I thought of changing "junkie" to "fakes" (that is, it was all make-believe bleeding and wounds), but then I realized that you might want to state that they (the couple were "junkies" drug addicts/users). Up to you, then.
Be careful with consistence in your texts in the future, since your chosen title was "a couple in fashion" but you were talking about his "fashionable" looks all the way. If it was a couple it had to be described the looks of both people, for example.