Correção de texto para cursinho
- Gabriel Malheiros
- Membro desde: 07 Mar 2015, 08:29
- Perfil · 20 Pontos · 14 Mensagens
Olá,
Eu estou fazendo um texto para um cursinho e gostaria de saber se está pelo menos apresentável. Alguem poderia me ajudar?
"Maybe the main problem of Brazil is not corruption in and itself, but the people. The human being is evil by nature. The meaning of corruption has changed since the dawn of the times, and so far, humans being did not come to an agreement about that.
For this reason, we still have a long way to go. And this way isn't expected to be a smooth one. Quite the contrary, it is likely to be a very bumpy one. But, if we are all together, perhaps, we can make it."
Muito obrigado
Eu estou fazendo um texto para um cursinho e gostaria de saber se está pelo menos apresentável. Alguem poderia me ajudar?
"Maybe the main problem of Brazil is not corruption in and itself, but the people. The human being is evil by nature. The meaning of corruption has changed since the dawn of the times, and so far, humans being did not come to an agreement about that.
For this reason, we still have a long way to go. And this way isn't expected to be a smooth one. Quite the contrary, it is likely to be a very bumpy one. But, if we are all together, perhaps, we can make it."
Muito obrigado
MELHORE SUA PRONÚNCIA EM INGLÊS
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Resposta mais votada
- Juliana Rios
- Localização: Canoas, RS
- Membro desde: 29 Ago 2013, 17:51
- Perfil · 19.5k Pontos · 1.3k Mensagens
Improvement suggestions:
Your piece is generally well written, but you may want to be careful with strong, overly assertive claims, such as "the human being is evil by nature". "Evil" sits at the far end of the moral spectrum, so even the natural, inborn human tendency to engage in acts that are morally questionable would still not fully (or even partially) qualify as "evil". Other than that, good job.Maybe Brazil's main problem is not corruption in and of itself, but the people. The human being is evil by nature. The meaning of corruption has changed since the dawn of time, and so far, human beings have not come to an agreement on that.
For this reason, we still have a long way to go. And this way isn't expected to be a smooth one. Quite the contrary, it is likely to be a very bumpy one (or "it will likely be a very bumpy one"). However, if we all keep / stick together, there's a (good) chance we can make it ("perhaps" is not wrong, but can be replaced by a smoother, less jarring transition phrase).