Correção de texto: Redação

Estou no nível intermediário no curso de inglês, mas quero fazer o TOEFL. Minha professora passou uma redação onde o tema foi um pouco difícil para mim. Gostaria de compartilhar com vocês e saber suas respectivas opiniões. Abraços.

Tema: "Many Families have importante traditions that family members share.What is one of your family's important traditions?
Use specific reasons and details to support your response."

Redação:

A long time ago we can see wich exist different traditions to different families, because each family have a different culture than other family. In Morocco for example the families traditions are so differents to the brazilian families.
There in Morroco for example only the mother and father choose the spouse for their son. Sometimes the grooms know each other only on wedding day, it's totally abnormal in Brazil, because here they can choose their future spouse.
Exist families wich have a particular traditions like the religion,food, dress and many others.
Some families have religion traditions , and they need to salve the saturday for their religion, they can't work, because they believe it's disrepect with their religion.
Some Families have an important traditions wich the members in the family need to follow because it was shared generation by generation, and the other families have a little traditions, but is not a very important, and the members can follow or not.
In my family for example we have a tradition to celebrate the important dates together, like birthdays, Christmas, Reveillon.
The last important date was my father's birthday, we can put togheter the members of my family and celebrate more one year with my father, we can talk about the family's project.
In my opnion, we have to respect each tradition family, because is some important to the members because some family share this by many years.

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Avatar do usuário Telma Regina 22725 9 58 570
Vinicius, I tried to write your text in more understandable English. Please, don't get me wrong, but you need to improve a lot more your English before taking the TOEFL examination.

"Many Families have important traditions that family members share. What is one of your family's important traditions?
Use specific reasons and details to support your response."

We can see that there are different traditions in different families. Each family has a different culture. In Morocco, for example, some family traditions are so different than the Brazilian ones.
In Morocco, the parents can choose a wife for their son. Sometimes the bride and groom get to know each other only on their wedding day. In Brazil, this is totally uncommon because the sons can choose their future wives.
There are families with particular traditions regarding religion, food, dressing amongst others.
Some families need to save the Saturday for their religion. They can't work, because they believe it is a disrespect towards their religion.
Others have some important traditions that the family members need to follow because they are passed from generation to generation.
Other families have small traditions that are not very important, and the members can choose to follow or not.
In my family, for example, we have a tradition to celebrate the important dates together, like birthdays, Christmas, New Year's Eve.
The last important date was my father's birthday when all the family members got together to celebrate one more year with my father, and we could talk about the family's project.
In my opinion, we have to respect each family tradition. It is important to their members because some traditions have been followed for many generations.
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Avatar do usuário PPAULO 39195 6 32 684
And my vote goes to...Telma Regina again. I appreciate you proofreaders, like Donay, you and others here. I learn a lot from your posts, really! To the point of getting me addicted to the Forum, he he!

And Vinicius, congrats on your summoning courage and coming out with your text.
This way you show a degree of maturity, sort of, and your English will improve fast. Good luck in your studies (Donay style) :lol: /keep up the good work (my style, if I have any - for the time being.) :oops: .