Correção do texto "It all happened last summer..."

It all happened last summer. I was having a good time at the beach, just relaxing and sunbathing. It was a sunny day with no wind. The water was warm, around 27° C. So I decided to go swimming alone. I was going deeper and deeper when I felt something wrong with my legs. Suddenly, I was drowning. My hearth raced and I couldn´t breathe. Soon everything was getting dark and I quickly passed out. I don’t know what happened after it. I only remember I waking up in a hospital.


thank you !
Editado pela última vez por Flavia.lm em 20 Nov 2011, 23:50.
Razão: padronização título

Anúncio Você tem medo de falar inglês? - Se você já estudou inglês mas ainda se sente inseguro(a) saiba que o primeiro passo é se expor ao idioma. Converse grátis por 15 minutos com um professor de inglês nativo, você vai se surpreender o quanto isso pode fazer a diferença.

Começar agora!
2 respostas
Donay Mendonça 22 102 1.5k
Algumas sugestões de melhoria:

It all happened last summer. I was having a good time at the beach, just relaxing and sunbathing. It was a sunny day with no wind. The water was warm, around 27° C. So I decided to go swimming alone. I was going deeper and deeper when I felt there was something wrong with my legs. Suddenly, I was drowning. My heart raced and I couldn´t breathe. Soon everything was getting dark and I quickly passed out. I don’t know what happened after it. I only remember waking up in a hospital.

Muito bom texto!
Thanks a lot !
Ainda precisa de ajuda? Confira algumas opções:
  1. Clique no botão "Responder" (abaixo) e faça sua pergunta sobre este assunto;
  2. Faça uma nova pergunta;
  3. Converse grátis com um professor nativo por 15 minutos: Saiba como!