Correção: Amazonia's Burning!

Olá pessoal fiz uma musica e a letra é essa, deem uma corrigida pra mim por favor, :)

Where's our green? Our beauty and our health?
Everything's fading away
Being burned down one by one I see
Nothing anymore can stops the rage of man and his power to burn
They live his lives and kill us just to kill

They have seen that we've been cried
And we've burned day by day
And no matter what the laws of man can say
While they cutting all my green vains
All my creatures disappear

The whole world knows , everyone knows
I do not understand why the man love kill us all
I can't understando the reason the man set fire!

My name is nature and we needing your helping hand
The same hand you use to kill can be used to make us well
My name is nature and we need your S.O.S
You must to set me free because my green became to grey
The whole world knows... Amazonia's burning...
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Avatar do usuário PPAULO 39205 6 32 684
I gave a cursory read through the first paragraph, and this caught my eye:

Nothing anymore can stops the rage of man and his power to burn. (power to burn ! a bit puzzled here about what you meant.)




So, some grammar and interpretation points I would like to make:

-Nothing can stop (never had ever seen "stops" can "can")
-Nothing anymore (two negatives, a no no, even if so - music takes some poetic licences- it would require a comma before ''anymore''.)


-So, a likely redoing here:
Nothing can stop the rage of man anymore, and his power to burn
-They live their his lives and kill us just because they can/want etc...


.
Of course, I didn´t check it out for rhyme or rhytm and melody, just for the meaning (in a sense). Because even with a good rhytm to it one will don´t expect too much of poetic licence, as much to make them not get the idea.
''-They live their his lives''? o ''his'' seguido do ''their? achei estranho, e não sería they no luger de their, qual a diferença entre essas duas palavas?
o que eu quis dizer com 'they live they lives '''eu quis dizer q eles vivem as vidas deles , ou suas vidas...

e quanto a todo o rsto resto q vc não citou está correto?
Avatar do usuário PPAULO 39205 6 32 684
Sorry my typo, it should be "they live their lives..."
The remaining parts I didn´t check out, so it may or may not be correct, I´ll try to come back to it later.
This month I got swamped with work :| and other things but perhaps tomorrow I will find a "window" of (free) time to work on it. ;)
Avatar do usuário PPAULO 39205 6 32 684
They have seen that we've been cried (if you mean the Amazon rainforest have been cried by someone else)
They have seen that we've been crying (if you mean the Amazon rainforest itself have been crying.)

And we've burned day by day
And no matter what the laws of man can say
(good as it is.)

While they (are ? have been?) cutting all my green vains
(perhaps better this way "while vainly they have been logging and leaving me (the forest) less green...


With that all my creatures are disappearing.



============================================
The whole world knows , everyone knows
I do not understand why the man like to destroy other creatures, mother nature and himself in the process.
I can't understand the reason why men set fires!

My name is Nature and we need your helping hand
The same hand you use to kill can be used to do good to us.
My name is Nature and we need your help.
You must set me free because my green turned into grey
The whole world knows... Amazonia's burning...


============
Again, it´s just a starter. It can be made better with more suggestions/opinions etc.
poisé , fiz a letra com a propria Amazonia na primeira pessoa
''While they (are ? have been?) cutting all my green vains'' estaría certo ''while they've been cutting all my green veins''?

sería ''enquanto eles cortam...''
Avatar do usuário PPAULO 39205 6 32 684
In a general way you could use "while they cut my green veins.", meaning: "enquanto eles cortam."
"while they are..." would also do the trick, it states that something is happening right now, and that it may have been happening for some time.
"while they have been" sounds like an action/a fact that has begun some time ago and persists.
As you may not be into the minutes of verb tenses, I think the boldened part suits better for you, it´s more neutral, it can talk about past action and of an action that keeps happening.
Now, let´s wait for more opinions and comments.