Correção de texto em inglês: essay

Hello folks,
I'm starting today what I name as "my writing improvement", and I would apreciate if you guys would take a look on my essays and tell what you think about it. I will post the topic of my essay (I mean what I'm developing about) and you can see if my essay is good or not. Please your opnion is very important to me.
Tpic
People attend college or university for many different reasons (for
example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge).
Why do you think people attend college or university? Use specific
reasons and examples to support your answer.


In these days a college degree is essential not just for the workplace but also for life. But, most of the people attend college or university to get a career preparation even with other good reasons like new experience and increased knowledge.
Nowadays we can have a lot of ways of preparation to get a job, like technical courses and professional courses. However, the best jobs and also ones which pay better are just reached by people who are graduated. In other words, it’s a prerequisite to get a good job a college degree. Also, when you are in a college or university, you have a range of opportunities to get a good job, like a teacher’s indication or even a research that you can do while is undergraduated would open doors for your future career.
Furthermore, we tend to not like studying for reasons like get knowledge or new experiences. We tend to study to get more money to reach a better life. So the main reason of attend to college or university is to get a better life which is reached by getting a better job which is reached by attending to a college for career preparation. That’s why we the main reason to attend in a college or university is because we are looking for a career preparation.
MENSAGEM PATROCINADA Aprenda dicas sobre os tempos verbais em inglês! Baixe agora o seu Guia Grátis de Tempos Verbais em Inglês. Ele contém um ótimo resumo para revisar todos os conceitos.

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Avatar do usuário Donay Mendonça 49085 21 73 1138
Algumas sugestões de melhoria dentro do que o contexto permite avaliar:

These days, a college degree is essential not just professionally but also for life. But most of the people who attend college or university to get a career preparation even with other good reasons like new experience and increased knowledge.
Nowadays we can have a lot of ways of preparation to get a job, like technical courses and professional courses. However, the best jobs and also ones which pay better are obtained by people who graduated. In other words, a prerequisite to get a good job is a college degree. Also, when you are in a college or university, you have a range of opportunities to get a good job, like a teacher’s recommendation or even research that you can do while you're undergraduated would open doors for your future career.
Furthermore, we tend not to like studying for reasons like get knowledge or new experiences. We tend to study to get more money to live a better life. So the main reason to attend college or university is to get a better life which is achieved by getting a better job which is achieved by attending college for career preparation. That’s why the main reason to attend college or university is because we are looking for a career preparation.
Thank's a lot Donay, I will bring in more essays as soon as possible.