Correção de Texto: Primeiro Capitulo de Divergente

Eai galera comecei a ler o livro Divergente e resolvi fazer o texto falando um pouco sobre o Primeiro capitulo, irei colocar a parte que escrevi em português e a que eu tentei retratar no inglês, fiquem livre pra expor as ideias e opiniões sobre outras formas de representar uma ideia porque é um ajudando o outro galera!

Texto I

No primeiro capitulo de divergente conhecemos Beatrice, ela é a protagonista da historia e mora juntos com seus pais e seu irmão mais velho, caleb. Logo no começo já conseguimos perceber os costumes da Abnegação. eles vivem de maneira simples e modesta e desapegada das vaidades, com um estilo de vida voltado a cuida do próximo. Segundo as características apresentadas no texto, Beatrice mora na periferia afastada da cidade, onde está localizada a escola onde ela e seu irmão frequentam. Para chegar até lá é necessário um ônibus, o trajeto para a escola é horrível com muitos remendos e todo cheio rachaduras. Beatrice passará por alguns testes na escola e saberá a qual facção pertence, porém a historia já revela, antes dos teste começarem, sua admiração com os membros da Audácia uma outra facção, caracterizada por serem carajosos e destemidos.

Texto II

in the first chapter of Divergent we get to know beatrice, she is protagonist of the story and lives together with her parents and her older brother, caleb.
Straight away in the beginning we already realize abnegation's customs. they live a plain and unassuming way and detached of vanities, with a lifestyle aimed to take care for other people.
According the features presented in the text, beatrice lives in a outskirts far away from town, where is located the school that she and her brother study. To get there it's necessary to use a bus. The path to school it's awful with a lot of patchy pavement and full of cracks.
beatrice will pass through some tests at school and will know which faction belongs, but the story already reveal , before the tests begin, her admiration to dauntless members who is another faction, characterized for being brave and fearless.
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in the first chapter of Divergent we get to know beatrice, she is the protagonist of the story and lives together with her parents and her older brother, Caleb.
From the very begginning we realize how generous/altruistic/selflessness/benevolent are the people depicted in the novel/work/book. They have a simple life, carefree, not concerned with vanities. They lifestyle focusing mostly on helping others.
So, from the information derived from the text/story, we/one can (safely) conclude that Beatrice lives in the city [1] outskirts; where she and her brother go to school. To get there, they need to cath/take a bus, the road is patchy and full of potholes and cracks (in it).
While the story rolls on/unfolds, Beatrice will prove her worth to gain symphaty to be a member of a group/clique, the one she feels she belongs to. [2]
But the story also reveals , that even before the tests begin, her admiration to dauntless members from the other group/clique, characterized for being brave and fearless.


[1] Outskirts - Generally, far from the city/town.
Unless it stated otherwise, as in "in the outskirst not far from the city/not far from the beach...etc.
http://www.learnersdictionary.com/qa/in ... -outskirts

[2]Group, a good choice of word here, "clique" is also a group, but sometimes understood as "panela/panelinha". Gang, only in highly informal/colloquial/slangy contexts, a no no most of the time.



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This is just a bit of text polishing, others can polish it up. So, let´s wait for more.
It is also a bit of "an idea", I didn´t mean to change your text much, but I feel I did, it´s up to you to spot the places where you can keep and the ones that (really) need to be left out/changed. I leave that as your homework, he hee.