Correção de Texto: Description of a picture - 1

Description of a picture.

In this picture there are six people. They like are teens and they are in a class. Only two of them are boys. In the background there are 3 girls, one of them is sitting. The girl is sitting on a red chair, she is reading or holding a book, she has curly hairs, her legs are crossed. In front of her is a study table. She is wearing a grey shirt, a red tie, slim dark jeans, and a pair of white all-star shoes. Next to her, there are two girls: in the center of the background, there is a girl wearing a blue sleeveless t-shirt and jeans and the other is wearing a denim blouse, a pink t-shirt, a red belt, jeans, and red shoes like a ballet shoes. Probably they are explaining something about Math because behind them is a board and covered in mathematical equations. In the right hand corner there is a potted plant vase, I think is fake plant. And the other people are sitting and watching, in the foreground of the picture.

A few doubt:
*They like are teens or they like are teenagers? What is better?
*In ‘Only two of them are boys/male’.. Can I replace ‘boys’ to ‘men’ ?
*Blouse for women? and Jacket for men? is correct?
*Which is correct? ‘Probably they are explaining.. ‘ or ‘They are probably explaining..’ ?
*Potplant or potted?

Note: I can't attached the image, but I hope you all understand =)

Thanks in advance.
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Avatar do usuário Redseahorse 7980 1 13 143
Sugestões:

In this picture, there are six people. They LOOK LIKE teens and they are in a class. Only two of them are MALE. In the background there are THREE girls, one of them is SEATED. The girl is SEATED on a red chair, she is HOLDING AND READING a book, she has curly HAIR, her legs are crossed. In front of her THERE is a study table. She is wearing a grey shirt, a red tie, (OPTIONALLY = A PAIR OF) slim dark jeans, and a pair of white all-star shoes. Next to her, there are two girls: in the center of the background, there is a girl WHO´S wearing a blue sleeveless t-shirt and jeans and the other ONE is wearing a denim blouse, a pink t-shirt, a red belt, jeans, and red shoes like a ballet ONES. THEY ARE PROBABLY explaining something about Math, because behind them THERE is a board WHICH IS FILLED WITH mathematical equations. In the right (hand - DROP OUT THIS) corner, there is a POT PLANT, I think IT is A fake plant. And the other people are SEATED in the foreground of the picture, THEY´RE watching.

*They like are teens or they like are teenagers? What is better? = COMO ADJETIVO, TEENS É O MESMO QUE TEENAGE BOYS & GIRLS, OU TEENAGERS (COLOQUIAL);
*In ‘Only two of them are boys/male’.. Can I replace ‘boys’ to ‘men’ ? = MALE, É MELHOR - (PERTINENTE AO GÊNERO);
*Blouse for women? and Jacket for men? is correct? = FEMALE BLOUSE E MALE JACKET, PENSO QUE SOA MELHOR;
*Which is correct? ‘Probably they are explaining.. ‘ or ‘They are probably explaining..’ ? = USUALMENTE, ADVÉRBIOS DE PROBABILIDADE APARECEM DEPOIS DO VERBO BE, OU ANTES DO VERBO PRINCIPAL;
*Potplant or potted? = POT PLANT.

saudações semânticas!
Thank you Redseahorse =)

I didn't know about 'one/ones' for replace a same noun.
e.g: 'red shoes like a ballet shoes'.. to 'red shoes like a ballet ones'.
Avatar do usuário PPAULO 39195 6 32 684
In this picture there are six people.  (or "this picture depicts six people/The picture shows six people…). To me “In this picture” could be a little bit cliché and not economical with words…


They look like (or - appear to be in their teens...) teens and they are in a class.


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In the entire group we can see that two (of them) are male, so they are decidedly outnumbered by women here.


In the background, we can see clearly three girls; one of them is sitting on a red chair and seemly reading or just holding a book. She has curly hair, and is now relaxed and in a crossed-leg position. [crossed left over right? Crossed away? Just wondering...but it would be acceptable as it was in your text.]
http://westsidetoastmasters.com/resourc ... hap10.html
http://www.indiabix.com/body-language/l ... -gestures/
What would sound odd, is to switch from one feature to another in not so subtle way, you all of sudden said she had curly hairs and then that she sat with legs crossed, it could sound like a maniac describing a target, it would give me the creeps if I was woman now! He he.
To avoid that, jump from a subject to the other in a more soft way or use conjunctions, connectors etc.


In the background, we can see clearly three girls; one of them is sitting on a red chair and in front her there is a study table (or better yet – “one of them is sitting at her desk” and “on a red chair”.) she is seemingly reading or just holding a book. That one has curly hair, and is now relaxed and with one leg neatly over the other.
She is wearing grey shirt, red tie, slim dark jeans and a pair of white All-Star shoes/sneakers.


Close to her, there are two more girls*: in the background center, there is this girl wearing a blue sleeveless t-shirt and jeans and the other one is wearing a denim blouse, pink t-shirt, red belt, jeans, and red ballet shoes – or "apparently ballet shoes" I mean [a].


*"two more girls", to avoid the reader "in a rush" to think that there only three girls on the picture, to be misled. Of course, if there are only two guys, then there are four girls around.

[a ] ...and red ballet shoes, it seems. Or “the ones used in ballet/like the ones used in ballet.”




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Probably they are explaining to each other their solutions/their reasonings about a Mathematic problem or something, because behind them is a blackboard covered in equations [OR covered with mathematical equations].

Another possibility? Problably they are discussing maths (“mathematics” is better if you want it more formal – I don´t know if you are thinking in written or spoken English, formal or informal.)

To many "maths" sounds slangy.




On the left of the picture, on a corner, there is a potted plant wich I think is a fake one. [OR “I assume that is fake one.”]
[with "potted plant" it´s not necessary to use the word “vase”.]






Finally, in the foreground of the picture; we see more people sitting and watching their lively discussion!

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Whoa! a little divergence between what you stated at the beggining and this. Didn´t you say that there were only six people in picture?
If there are more students, then you should say that “there are six main characters in the picture...or something like that, so the rest of the class would be only watching the discussion. Don´t you think so?
Avatar do usuário PPAULO 39195 6 32 684