Como dizer "Eu? Imagina!" em inglês

Hello there, I would like to know how could I say "imagina" in the 2 situations below in English. Thanks in advance.

"Eu nem falo português direito, imagina inglês!"

"Foi você que quebrou o copo?"
"Não, imagina!"

ENTENDENDO AS HORAS EM INGLÊS
Nesta aula, a professora Camila Oliveira ensina vários macetes para você nunca mais se confundir na hora de dizer as horas em inglês. ACESSAR AULA
1 resposta
PPAULO 6 48 1.2k
I can't even speak Portuguese well, let alone English.

It was you that broke the glass, wasn't it?
Mee! No way.

Obviously, if the one answering the question wanted to use some sarcasm he or she could say "fat chance that I broke the glass." But to avoid ambiguity and the asker think you did the "wrongdoing"' I suggest the above one.
Anyway, the sarcastic answer would require especial intonation.